I remember there was a speaker at a marriage conference I went to that said, “you haven’t truly forgiven someone if you are still thinking of things to say to them about why they are wrong.” I am struggling with forgiveness for many people. I let go of so much I held dear in order to heal, not realizing the goal was only attainable through forgiveness... actually I am figuring that out as I type this post... So I forgive him for not understanding me. I forgive her for neglecting me. I must forgive them all. The more I draw inward and practice slowing, silence, solitude, and simplicity, the more people I must forgive. As I quiet, my inner voice begins to tell them why I am right and they are wrong. Why I’m innocent and they’re guilty. And then I repeat the mantra, “Jesus Christ, have mercy on me, a sinner” and “Because of Jesus, I will let go.” Then after forgiving them again, I hear the shaming voice of the enemy that says it is me that won’t change. And I do the most powerful thing I know how to do: I forgive myself.